Fuck I hate vodka.

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Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Sun Oct 09, 2016 1:08 am

I just bought some (and by some I mean a lot) for old times sake, and god fucking dammit this shit is disgusting. I didn't even go with the really cheap shit, got some Smirnoff ice. Yeah, it's cheap, but not that cheap. And I can't fucking stand this shit. Had a glass of it with some coke, and it was a fucking mission to get this shit down.

Then I remembered some shit I saw years and years ago, about using a water filter to filter the vodka and make it better. I never did it, because it was easier to switch to whiskey, but I decided to give it a shot. First pass through, night and fucking day. No more fucked up rubbing alcohol smell, and the taste was very noticeable. HUGE difference. Did three more passes, and each time it got better and better. I ended up saying fuck it after the fourth pass, because the difference between the first and fourth wasn't as big as it was between unfiltered and first pass. But it did get noticeably better every time.

So now I'm drinking a glass of coke, that tastes like coke (with a bit of vodka), even though half of it is vodka. I'm starting to wonder what more passes would make it taste/smell like, and if it can be done with the dirt cheap shit. And now I'm starting to wonder what cheap Canadian whiskey pushed through a filter would be like. I need to buy more filters, and start testing this shit out.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby hansmoleman » Sun Oct 09, 2016 1:20 am

I dnt care what anybody says, a distilled spirit that hasn't been aged in a nice barrel is basically nail polish remover.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Sun Oct 09, 2016 1:22 am

hansmoleman wrote:I dnt care what anybody says, a distilled spirit that hasn't been aged in a nice barrel is basically nail polish remover.


At least nail polish remover smells better than rubbing alcohol.

Edit

Alright so I got bored. Want to see how far I can take this shit. 5th pass, I can't even smell the alcohol anymore, and I have to swish it on my tongue for a few seconds before I can even taste it. At this rate, by the 10th pass through, I won't even be able to taste it.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby DruidV » Sun Oct 09, 2016 11:20 am

Try the Skyy.
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Is it safe?
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:14 pm

Well I did it. Odorless, tasteless, and if cold enough, vodka that doesn't burn your throat (at all). Just took a swig and it felt like drinking cold water. I know what you guys might be thinking, but if I wanted flavor I'd drink whiskey. This shit on the other hand is basically like "make anything you want alcoholic without ruining the taste".
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby trajan » Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:40 pm

ManWithAPlan wrote:Well I did it. Odorless, tasteless, and if cold enough, vodka that doesn't burn your throat (at all). Just took a swig and it felt like drinking cold water. I know what you guys might be thinking, but if I wanted flavor I'd drink whiskey. This shit on the other hand is basically like "make anything you want alcoholic without ruining the taste".


Makes ya wonder why the makers of cheap vodka don't spend an extra nickel a gallon to filter it a couple more times and tack an extra 50 cents onto the price of each bottle.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:46 pm

trajan wrote:
ManWithAPlan wrote:Well I did it. Odorless, tasteless, and if cold enough, vodka that doesn't burn your throat (at all). Just took a swig and it felt like drinking cold water. I know what you guys might be thinking, but if I wanted flavor I'd drink whiskey. This shit on the other hand is basically like "make anything you want alcoholic without ruining the taste".


Makes ya wonder why the makers of cheap vodka don't spend an extra nickel a gallon to filter it a couple more times and tack an extra 50 cents onto the price of each bottle.


I wonder if they're owned by the expensive companies, and use the cheap shit to get people to justify paying $50 for a bottle.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby SardonicYuda » Thu Oct 13, 2016 6:07 am

Russian Standard left in the freezer for a couple of hours is all I need
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby The-Bourbonator » Thu Oct 13, 2016 8:06 am

SardonicYuda wrote:Russian Standard left in the freezer for a couple of hours is all I need


Hanging out with Yuda, I can attest to this, and I usually can't stand vodka.

Chilled Irish Whiskey is even better.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby SardonicYuda » Fri Oct 14, 2016 6:43 am

The-Bourbonator wrote:
SardonicYuda wrote:Russian Standard left in the freezer for a couple of hours is all I need


Hanging out with Yuda, I can attest to this, and I usually can't stand vodka.

Chilled Irish Whiskey is even better.

Oooooh. That sounds like fun, but when you say chilled do you mean served in a cold glass, with ice (or frozen metal ball) or stick it in the freezer like I do with the dangerous amount of vodka I drink?
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby Merlin » Fri Oct 14, 2016 10:37 am

trajan wrote:
ManWithAPlan wrote:Well I did it. Odorless, tasteless, and if cold enough, vodka that doesn't burn your throat (at all). Just took a swig and it felt like drinking cold water. I know what you guys might be thinking, but if I wanted flavor I'd drink whiskey. This shit on the other hand is basically like "make anything you want alcoholic without ruining the taste".


Makes ya wonder why the makers of cheap vodka don't spend an extra nickel a gallon to filter it a couple more times and tack an extra 50 cents onto the price of each bottle.


Money.

People will buy the cheaper vodka and the filtration adds to the cost. Also, 50 cents can be up to half the profit on a cheap bottle of booze. Most of what we pay in the States is tax. Look at a bottle of rubbing alcohol. You can't drink it because it's denatured and will blind you but you can buy a liter for less than a dollar.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby Merlin » Fri Oct 14, 2016 12:53 pm

To give you some idea of how ridiculous alcohol prices are take this calculation.

You can buy 25 pounds of sugar for $12. For every 5 pounds of sugar you can get 6.88 liters of 40% alcohol after distillation. that's 34.4 liters of drinkable alcohol for $12, the cost of energy (not much) and a packet of yeast. About 35 cents per liter.

Let's take this a step further. You take the corn you can't sell or all the old apples that fall to the ground. You cook them to release the sugar then make alcohol out of that. Effective cost is zero except for your spare time.

That is what the Whiskey Rebellion was all about. Government wanted to tax that alcohol. The government unfortunately won that one and it is the defining point where this country started its long slow spiral down the drain.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ranome » Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:17 pm

Merlin wrote:
You can buy 25 pounds of sugar for $12. For every 5 pounds of sugar you can get 6.88 liters of 40% alcohol after distillation. that's 34.4 liters of drinkable alcohol for $12, the cost of energy (not much) and a packet of yeast. About 35 cents per liter.



After which, you have 34.4 liters of what, exactly? (Asking for a friend.)
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:34 pm

ranome wrote:
Merlin wrote:
You can buy 25 pounds of sugar for $12. For every 5 pounds of sugar you can get 6.88 liters of 40% alcohol after distillation. that's 34.4 liters of drinkable alcohol for $12, the cost of energy (not much) and a packet of yeast. About 35 cents per liter.



After which, you have 34.4 liters of what, exactly? (Asking for a friend.)


I'm guessing something close to moonshine.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby fester » Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:50 pm

I must say that the filter method is easier than redistilling it three or four times.
Is this a Brita type filter you are using?
I'm very curious, sounds like you are refining it to pure ethanol and water.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:53 pm

fester wrote:I must say that the filter method is easier than redistilling it three or four times.
Is this a Brita type filter you are using?
I'm very curious, sounds like you are refining it to pure ethanol and water.


It's one of these.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby Merlin » Sat Oct 15, 2016 12:05 pm

ManWithAPlan wrote:
ranome wrote:
Merlin wrote:
You can buy 25 pounds of sugar for $12. For every 5 pounds of sugar you can get 6.88 liters of 40% alcohol after distillation. that's 34.4 liters of drinkable alcohol for $12, the cost of energy (not much) and a packet of yeast. About 35 cents per liter.



After which, you have 34.4 liters of what, exactly? (Asking for a friend.)


I'm guessing something close to moonshine.


Exactly. It would be 40% alcohol or 80 proof. Moonshine is no different than vodka. They are just both alcohol and water.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby MrPolityczny » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:02 pm

ManWithAPlan wrote:I just bought some (and by some I mean a lot) for old times sake, and god fucking dammit this shit is disgusting.


I am not a big fan of vodka too but as a Polack I can give you two tips:

1) Even cheap vodka goes in without problems when it is cold enough (it appears as a thick as syrup).

2) Forget about mixing vodka with Coke, orange juice or something like that. Take a shot of pure vodka and imminently after drink some tomato juice.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby The-Bourbonator » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:33 pm

SardonicYuda wrote:
The-Bourbonator wrote:
SardonicYuda wrote:Russian Standard left in the freezer for a couple of hours is all I need


Hanging out with Yuda, I can attest to this, and I usually can't stand vodka.

Chilled Irish Whiskey is even better.

Oooooh. That sounds like fun, but when you say chilled do you mean served in a cold glass, with ice (or frozen metal ball) or stick it in the freezer like I do with the dangerous amount of vodka I drink?


Noooo. No Ice. It'll dilute the whiskey goodness.

Whiskey rocks would probably be ok, but I always worry about busting a tooth.

Stick the whiskey in the freezer the same way you chill your vodka.

Same as with the chilled vodka, it's less of a liquid and more like a syrup. Cold whiskey syrup. So good.

Fuck, now I'm craving Jameson. :lol:
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby fester » Sat Oct 15, 2016 4:05 pm

MWAP, have you noticed a lessening of any hangover symptoms due to the removal of impurities?
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby ManWithAPlan » Sat Oct 15, 2016 4:19 pm

fester wrote:MWAP, have you noticed a lessening of any hangover symptoms due to the removal of impurities?


Yes, no hangovers or bullshit whatsoever. I mean I tend to drink water to prevent that, but this is far more pleasant. I also noticed it hits me way harder so I tend to drink less of it. No clue how this works, but it's like it gets into my system faster.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby SardonicYuda » Sun Oct 16, 2016 5:33 pm


Noooo. No Ice. It'll dilute the whiskey goodness.

Whiskey rocks would probably be ok, but I always worry about busting a tooth.

Stick the whiskey in the freezer the same way you chill your vodka.

Same as with the chilled vodka, it's less of a liquid and more like a syrup. Cold whiskey syrup. So good.

Fuck, now I'm craving Jameson. :lol:

I'm starting to think there might be a market for alcoholic pancake syrup.
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby The-Bourbonator » Tue Oct 18, 2016 5:47 am

SardonicYuda wrote:

Noooo. No Ice. It'll dilute the whiskey goodness.

Whiskey rocks would probably be ok, but I always worry about busting a tooth.

Stick the whiskey in the freezer the same way you chill your vodka.

Same as with the chilled vodka, it's less of a liquid and more like a syrup. Cold whiskey syrup. So good.

Fuck, now I'm craving Jameson. :lol:

I'm starting to think there might be a market for alcoholic pancake syrup.


...my god.

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PATENT THAT SHIT YOU STUPID FUCKIN GENIUS!
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby MrPolityczny » Tue Oct 18, 2016 1:01 pm

SardonicYuda wrote:I'm starting to think there might be a market for alcoholic pancake syrup.


Mix maple syrup with pure ethanol and that's it... :twisted: :mrgreen:
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Re: Fuck I hate vodka.

Postby SardonicYuda » Wed Oct 19, 2016 6:51 am

MrPolityczny wrote:
SardonicYuda wrote:I'm starting to think there might be a market for alcoholic pancake syrup.


Mix maple syrup with pure ethanol and that's it... :twisted: :mrgreen:

I'm thinking it would need to be flavored like booze, at least a bit. The easiest to work with would be rum since that's made of molasses. I'm thinking it would be a lot like those crepes with brandy poured over them
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